JUST WHEN YOU THINK YOU KNOW

You know how you are with that one person and he makes you feel so safe and on top of the world and then you are left to come crashing to pieces? That is just one way to describe the story narrated in this article. Love should never hurt anyone and men, if you love her, you shouldn't think of cheating on her. No one deserves to go through that heartache. Enjoy...

How Well Do YOU Know Your Partner? 

I just found out he has been busy behind my back while I am going around clueless and telling everyone who cares to listen that he is the best man in the world. I am sitting there and having myriads of emotions driving me crazy. I don’t know if I should be angry, sad or happy but I know one thing, I love him so much and thinking about it hurts.

Thinking about the fact that he couldn’t stop telling me about how much he loved me and would never hurt me even hurts more. There is dead silence. We are both quiet and the next thing I hear is “it’s your fault. You caused it. Your attitude drove me to it”. Just what I needed to hear like seriously? “Are you telling me this to my face?” I say in the calmest way possible. He goes on to justify his actions by telling me that he needed something to make him happy.

Alright let’s start from the beginning and contextualise things a bit. I met this really nice guy that made me believe in love. He knew how to make me laugh when I really didn’t want to laugh and was always there for me. I trusted him with all my heart and never believed he would have eyes for another woman since I believed I did my best to be a good woman. But you never know with men hey. Sometimes you think you know what they want, other times you realise that you are simply clueless because they always end up surprising you most times.

 Anyway, we dated for a while and he painted this beautiful picture of our world for me but unfortunately forgot to frame it. I really thought I was doing everything right and that it was just the two of us. Then I finally realised it wasn’t just two of us. What surprised me the most was the way he managed to hide that from me. Oh well, I just realised now that he was just a very smooth operator and blinded me with kindness so that I wouldn’t see the real person he was. Like the old saying goes, ‘nothing lasts forever’ especially lies. It took me a while but I finally found out not only in the most painful way but I was also to be blamed for it. I understood the cheating part because seriously we are talking about a man here but blaming me for it? That part I couldn’t just comprehend. Where do you get off trying to justify your actions with passing the blame?

If you are capable of doing anything like cheating without thinking about the fact that your actions will have consequences, you should also be able to take responsibility for your actions. There is no need to play the outdated game of applying attack as the best form of defence. Why try to make me feel like I failed in my role as your partner? If you were really that unhappy, we could have been civil about it and parted ways without anyone getting hurt. And he concluded by saying “it was a mistake; I still want to be with you because she couldn’t make me happy”. Hmmm (that is me thinking) and I finally realise that the problem is really him and nobody else. If he did it once, he will do it again and forgiving him will be simply giving him a license to keep doing it. There is no such thing as forgiveness with men because they tend to take it for weakness. If he really loves you, he will never dare to hurt you in any way and will never make excuses for it. People who refuse to take responsibility for their actions never change because they don’t even see anything wrong with their actions – that is a big problem.

Remain happy and spread happiness around. xoxo