"Congratulations you are blessed among women"?

 

“Are you Nigerian?” that is the question I was asked today in the middle of a conversation with a friend. What does it mean to be Nigerian please? Does it mean not being human? I never understand what people mean when they ask me that question. Okay, let’s put things in context. For some reason, convos among young people always seem to be around relationship between the opposite sexes; my conversation wasn’t an exception. I simply disputed the fact that a man is not a need to any woman and that marriage is not an achievement and that question arose. Yes I know a lot of you think otherwise but this is strictly my opinion.

I don’t see how a man is a need in anyway. They don’t contribute to the existence of any woman. It is true that most women believe that their lives depend on men but there have been instances where those men cease to exist and the women still go on existing. It’s simply a thing of the mind and about priorities. Unfortunately, the Nigerian society has groomed women to think and strongly believe that marriage is the ultimate achievement for a woman. As a result, we find unmarried women lose the joy of living just because they don’t have husbands. A wedding photo on social networks get the most likes and comments. I once read a comment on a wedding photo that said, “Congratulations, you are blessed among women”. Seriously? Why is she blessed among women?

So these are just some of the comments that triggered the above question. And my answer to that is, “I am first of all human before anything else. So if thinking that marriage is not an achievement makes me non-Nigerian then I am non-Nigerian. I am not defined by social conventions. I don’t think the way anyone expects me to think because I am me”. The world has degenerated to a stage where many people don’t even have a good reason to be married. A man wakes up one morning and decides, “Oh I am getting old and I need children” then he goes through his list of numerous women, picks one and marry, not for love or companionship but for babymaking then continues with his single life. Please if it suits you, do it. However, stop thinking that you are better than the next person just because s/he is unmarried.

Anyway, remain happy and spread happiness around. Xoxo 


Image: sanctuaryclassics.com